Is there any other kind? From the end of August to the end of September, Rule 71 has been dormant. The sports world is flourishing with stories that are soon to come. But one story, of demise, is the story this writer has been aching over for a month, a season- a lifetime. For a glimpse into the Red Sox Nation way of thinking, here is the Diary of A Mad Red Sox Fan.
Thursday September 1, 2011 I strutted into a sports bar wearing my Red Sox jersey to watch the first game of the college football season. My apparel was met by un-approving people wearing harsh looks, scoffing at my attire that reeked of the “wrong sport”.
How dare I bring baseball to a place like this, during a time like this?
Earlier that day as I poured over my TV depicting the quiet pitch by pitch game, other TV’s, in the newsroom where I work, blared with big cheers and big plays that eagerly tackled my baseball peace. But I was happy to have college football chaos back because September transition in baseball is just plain stressful.
To kick off the new month, the Sox did something in pure Sox fashion. Lose game three to the Yankees, in Fenway. Of course.
When something is given to the Sox on a platter they slap it away while yelling, ‘I don’t need your fucking platter!’ That’s what they do, and Sept. 1, 2011 was no exception to the countless other nights I sat defeated in my Red Sox jersey once again.
But here I go, as friends would say, always the complainer when it comes to Boston. Relatively speaking the Sox don’t have much to complain about. But settling with “good” is not possible when fan’s expectations rest with perfection. It has been said that it's easier to have nothing than to have everything. Enter the Fenway Faithful, because their everything is Red Sox Baseball.
September 8, 2011
As it is clearly into September, I battle the biggest bout of writer’s block known to mankind. Fitting because even if I could get out of it, I would only be writing about the success on the college football gridiron. NOT, the submission of first place by the Red Sox.
Thankfully Tim Wakefield, come hell or high water, (i.e good or terrible writing) is pulling me out of the writing isolation in time so that I can hopefully (fingers crossed) celebrate his 200th win with him and the organization he has so nobly dedicated his life and career to. He of all people know chasing a dream can take time, and this particular dream has taken over a month, dangling at the cusp of 199. Maybe its nice to look up the hill and know you still have a little bit to go to see from the top. Maybe its nice to know that you can get there, but in that knowledge, you can take your time- smell the roses. Or in the case of a knuckleballer you can try all you want and know the proverbial “ball” of fate is never really in your hands. Dealing with defeat and frustration is in their job description if not their DNA and Wakefield is the best of the best of his kind.
September 10, 2011
With the drop from first in the rankings, so too comes the drop from first in baseball for number of runs to second. Remember for the Sox; Resiliency is a frustrating necessity to a complete season.
For the first time, real panic is starting to set in. And trust me it’s a different kind of panic than the 0-6 start we had in April. April is child’s play, September is a whole other game.
In a weird change of direction my Youtube account recommends a video from 2011's Spring Training. During a press conference in February, a reporter talks about pitcher Josh Beckett and a comment he made, saying there hadn’t been a team with 100 wins in a while and he thinks this team would be the one.
“Is he getting ahead of himself?” the reporter asked.
General Manager Theo Epstien answered. Even from Fort Myers Florida, Theo foreshadowed our current despair whether he knew it would happen or not, he warned all the same. “I think its nice that those players feel good about themselves and their teammates and what we have here, but, let's be honest- we haven’t done anything yet. I mean, all we have is a bunch of guys in this club house here to try to set out and do a job,” he said.
“We’ve got a lot to prove. We got to prove we’re not a third place team in this division, we’ve got to prove we can stay healthy. We’ve got to prove repeat performances, what guys have done in the past that they can come out and do it again in 2011. We’ve got to prove that we can come together as a team.”
Epstien counted the things the Red Sox needed to prove on his fingers as he spoke. As his index finger raised to represent his first address- our current standings waved like a red flag in my mind. As his middle finger rose to join the index, visions of third basemen Kevin Youkalis and pitcher Clay Bucholz rang clear in my head. When his third finger and pinky finger joined the rest to reveal the four things the Red Sox needed to prove even way back when, it was clear they needed to prove them now. Yet all I could see was a collage of Papi, Pedrioa, Gonzolez with their heads down, arms resting on the dugout fence- eyes coming up only to look out at the uncertainty of their post season prosperity.
September 15, 2011
Tim’s 200th win and the Sox regaining dominance in their league never happened the day I thought it would.
For Tim, his fate would come on a Tuesday, Sept 13 night- finally, on his eighth try. The cheers supporting his storied career were celebrated in the dismal reality of the organization’s play-off berth.
Fast forward to the start of the most pivotal series to date, by every ounce of the definition- pivotal.
What the experts call ‘simple math’. The Sox lead the Wild Card by 4 games. Second place are the Rays. The Rays play the Sox in a four-game series. For each team it is literally do or die.
I go onto NESN’s website and as they cover the important clash, I also see two stories talking about the Sox’s 2004 win. Readable news is their business but these headlines are not good for the business of baseball for the Red Sox. Nothing can stress more that this isn’t 2004 quite like a look at the current standings. As a die hard fan, sometimes cruel with over the top criticism, I don’t want the memory of 2004 even entering 2011’s October. Why? Because no amount of previous triumph, paper wins or records can help the Sox now. In a season of over 160 games past and future often become large focuses in the game. This series brings priority of the present. Welcome to the here and now.
Take a deep breathe people that almost-playoff air is crisp with anticipation.
September 27, 2011
I have awoken from my writing slumber because the story of the Red Sox is too poetic to lose. Things look bad. But if the last five months taught me anything, its that just cause something looks bad doesn’t mean you can’t overcome. Our problems are personified to pitching, but hitters aren’t without their frustration, catchers without their injuries.
And when life or a season gets to this point, nothing matters in measuring time but day-to-day, inning-to-inning, pitch-to-pitch, catch-to-catch.
The Sox are 6-18 in September. Yeah. Oh and they haven’t won two games in a row since August 27th.
Yesterday (Monday) we lost with Beckett, our best pitcher, on the mound. The always trusty Jacoby dropped a catch in center letting the Orioles score and every Sox fan to have flashbacks of unthinkable times. Just think, a day before on Sunday night, MVP candidate Ellsbury lifted hopes, stopped hearts and reincarnated faith in the swing of his bat in the top of the 14th to get his 31st homer of the season with two on base. We beat the Yankees and for a moment being so close to death seemed like a biblical but possible chance to come back to life. The mentality I’ve kept through this all is if any team can make it back from the worst collapse in baseball- it would be the Red Sox. I can be stereotypical and list off a million Disney like and so-typical phrases like, “Keep the faith” or that one simple word we saw so many times years ago. Believe.
But reality has been a cruel mistress to the Red Sox organization this year. Reality has beaten down the door of the rhetoric of well-orchestrated rosters and players on paper who are unstoppable.
Spring training was heaven in that regard. But that was a lifetime ago. The start of the season with a 0-6 start was purgatory, stuck at the cusp right before the real worry when expectations painted a much prettier picture than the start we were seeing. Then bats exploded and football scores greeted us from ball parks around the country as something clicked and the Sox were doing what they were supposed to.
Stop.
I’m getting lost in the gilded age.
I sit with reality- September 27th and it is telling me a 9 game lead in the wild card was just lost. Lost.
Down to the wire doesn’t hold a candle to where the sox are now. When it counts the most, confusion, horrible pitching, injuries and an indescribable x-factor are a concoction to the hell we are in now. Players are stunned, fans are stunned.
All the while, Yankees fans come out of the woodwork in a time of year the Bronx call, “calling all bandwagoners!” They couldn’t even sell out a Sox/Yankees night game at the end of September. There are few die-hard Yankees fans held to the Boston definition, because Red Sox fans know nothing but. And right now they are all dying hard.
Hope is but a tiny flicker, but a flame none-the-less.
